When Jacob cried

You didn't know Jacob could cry. Papa put in the batteries, thinking you would enjoy playing with a doll that cries, and stops when you give him the pacifier. Instead, you were concerned, astounded, and almost started crying. We asked you to hold him, give him a pacifier, and make him feel better. "You are his mommy, hold him," we said. You did, reluctantly, and you were deeply disturbed. For a few minutes you were torn between pushing him away, and pleasing us. The pacifier fell. He started crying again. You pleaded we make him stop.

I don't know for sure what disturbed you: Was it Jacob's crying or the process of putting in the batteries, which you described as "surgery"?

We took out the batteries which made you feel better, but you were still affected by the experience. At dinner, you asked for your doll Susan, which you never do while eating. Maybe you wanted to show us that you did care about your "babies." Just not Jacob at the moment. You didn't want Jacob close to you  and it bothered you to look at him.

First we tried an emotional approach, telling you that we loved you even when you cried, then a rational approach, explaining how batteries work - "they make your flashlight shine, and your other dolls sing." I told you about a doll I had when I was your age that could walk when we put batteries inside. You listened, and understood. I put Jacob visible in your room, in his stroller, so you see him often, and get over the fear. We thought that all was well. The next evening you told papa "we should give Jacob away and get another doll." Later I asked you if you liked Jacob. You didn't say no. Instead you said you liked Andre, a friend of yours from daycare. Tonight we'll make muffins. Maybe we can give one to Jacob.

Kiss,
Mommy