Grandfather Avram

My little Zoe,

You have four grandparents and you met them all. That's pretty lucky.

Grandfather Avram was determined to make it to your 4-month birthday. Contrary to his fears, you greeted him with friendly smiles - enough to make up for weeks of worry that you might actually cry at your first encounter. Until his arrival he kept in touch with you through Skype, your blog, and email. You can read them when you're old enough to check emails.

G. Avram treats you like the eighth wonder. No, I never was the seventh. I guess it's ok, since I treat you like that too. You're enjoying the advantages of the First-born - child and grandchild.

I refer to G. Avram as your best friend, since you are enjoying his company very much.  You sealed that friendship with a ritual ablution when you peed on his shirt sleeve. Good thing your pee doesn't smell yet, because he had to wear the shirt for the rest of that day. G. Avram sings to you and takes you out for walks. Like G. Roza, he carries you around the parking lot so you can greet me when I return from work. That is the moment of biggest conflict in my day. You look happy to see me, so it makes me feel good. And at the same time I feel guilt for having made you wait for me.

G. Avram watches you as you sleep, and if you wake up, he skips the bus and takes one that arrives after you go back to sleep. He is sad to be leaving you soon.

Progress report

Baby Zoe,

You've been entertaining us with new moves. Last night we were going through the usual dinnertime routine. We sit to eat, you want to nurse, either me or someone else cuts my food, depending on how urgently you want to nurse, when you are done, you sit on my lap,observe and smile, as we eat and talk.

Last night there was no way of making you wait. So Grandma Maria cut my food to small pieces while I started feeding you. In fact, your impatience started way before dinner, when Grandma Maria and I went shopping, and left you with Grandpa Avram. When we came back, we saw your empty stroller on the patch of grass by the parking lot, with you and G.Avram nowhere in sight. I heard your screams way before I entered the apartment, where G. Avram stood soaked in sweat, carrying you. "I just changed her," he said anxiously, as he passed you on to me. He had to walk nonstop for 2 hours, carrying you, or else, you'd start screaming. You don't go through such episodes with me, but I've witnessed similar scenes with your other caregivers.

In Part 2 of dinner - where you happily sit on my lap and smile, you started dipping your hands in my plate and pulling salad pieces. I took the pieces of leaves, wiped your hands clean, just so you dip them back in. I've been waiting for this stage, but I'm not sure how to handle it. We've been thinking of steam-cleaning the carpet. I'm wondering if that's a bad idea since soon you'll be testing gravity.

I thought it would never happen. But you finally got sleepy. When we came to check up on you in the crib, you rotated 180 degrees. A few minutes later, you rotated another 90 degrees, thus completing a a 270 degree counter-clockwise rotation.

Kiss,
Mommy.

Four-month wellness check

Baby Zoe,

You are on your way to become a model - although, we want you to get education and use your brain.  Here is the summary of your 4-months doctors visit:

Weight: 6.05kg / 13lb 55oz (50%)
Height: 63.5cm / 25in (75%)
Vaccinations: DTaP and Rotavirus 

You spread smiles and giggles to the medical staff and took the vaccines without tears - only a look of confusion which read "why would you inflict such pain on me."

As the doctor was listening to your lungs and heart, you grabbed her stethoscope and yanked it off.
After the examination the doctor said that you are tall, slim, and very strong. The staff univocally agreed that you were a happy baby.

Love,
Mommy

Happy 4 months!

Hi baby Zoe,

On July 15 you completed 4 months of your life. A pretty olive dress, complements of Grandpa Avram, barely covered your diaper. A white shirt and a white bow made you extra festive. We went to Fabi & Rosi where you spent an evening wrapped in a blanket before, having pooped on your outfit. It is also the restaurant frequented by our cat Alcatraz on Friday nights, as I was told by the owner.

Grandpa Avram has been waiting ("with four eyes" they say in his language) to share this day with you. He wore a suite and a tie - no, this is not how my birthdays were celebrated, if celebrated at all ;-).  You were hungry, and a tad tired, so you cried on the way. I was afraid to take you in, but managed to take advantage of a moment of silence. As soon as we sat down, I started nursing you, which turned your mood around. You were a happy baby, unaware of the bow or the dress on which you drooled immensely.

We took pictures, drank wine, and ate a cake with a candle placed by the chef and blown by me. It was an elegant evening - a contrast to the wild little Zoe. The following day was your 4-month pediatrician visit.

Nonna Maria and Nonno Alberto

Little Zoe,

A couple of days before Grandma Roza left, Grandparents Maria and Alberto came to meet you. Having raised two of her own, G. Maria is a natural with babies, and she took over your care from G. Roza while I'm at work. G. Alberto planned a short visit, but under your charm, he extended his stay by a few days.

G. Alberto loves our cats and pays a lot of attention to them. So having him was a treat for the cats as well. Alcatraz followed him around, and Uhura found a cozy bed on his dirty laundry.

As expected from a healthy relationship between in-laws, G. Maria and Mommy differ in their views of childcare and marital roles. An age-old conflict between the traditional and the modern - which makes the conflict normal, and our love for you makes it all manageable.

G. Maria washes your butt when you poop, and your face and under your chin when you drool, so you don't get pimples. She watches you play, and reports any development I might have missed while at work. She also talks to you a lot so you develop strong language skills, and folds your laundry. She is always ready to hold you and give parents a break.

Little Red Riding Hood

Little Zoe,

What has the world come to? They re-wrote the good old fairy tales. They teach no lesson, and provoke no thought anymore.

You and I went to a bookstore last week and got you a colorful book titled In the Jungle, and two fairy tales - Hansel and Gretel and the Little Red Riding Hood.

In the Jungle tells the story of animal friends playing hide-and-seek. The drawings are big and colorful, but the text is minimal. When I read it to you, I elaborate on the images to make the story longer. You like looking at the pages. Hansel and Gretel takes the reader outside the comfort zone through a story of abandonment by one's own parents. I picked this story because it triggers questions beyond "what happens next" to "why" and "how come" these things happen.

I picked the Little Red Riding Hood because, well, because the store didn't have the original Cinderella story, and I wanted to buy at least three books and stay under $20. I picked the Little Red over other books, because it is fun, moderately suspenseful, and educational. But lo and behold! When I started reading it to you I couldn't believe my own ears! This was not the original story, but a crappy, naive, and useless adaptation. It was an epitome of modern day American taste where everything is simplified, fantasized, stripped from things that provoke thought or put people at emotional unease. Forget about wolfs being dangerous menaces. Little Red Riding Hood actually has two wolf cubs as pets. AS PETS! There is no confrontation between the big wolf and the Little Red Riding Hood. The wolf doesn't even want to eat the grandma. All he wants, is to eat a cookie shaped like the grandma. A COOKIE! What wolf eats a cookie? No lesson about trust and caution, no encouragement of exploration. It makes me angry to think of reading that book to a child. I'm mad that it got published. I was reading the story to you while you were breastfeeding. When I noticed how stupid it was, my voice went down. I felt I was lying to you, and damaging your potential to develop your intellect and grow as an individual. I will not read that book to you again. I feel bad because the colors and the drawings are pretty, and you might enjoy looking at them. I'll go back to the store and see if they carry the real story with nice pictures.

Love,

Mommy.

Good bye Grandma Roza

As the airplane took off, Grandma Roza was crying, I'm sure. In two months, she saw you evolve from a tiny baby, unaware of her surroundings, to one that expresses emotions, engages in conversations (in your own language) and imitates facial expressions. She made you laugh and sang you songs. She cleaned countless poopy butts, washed many spit-soaked clothes, walked you for miles, helped you fall asleep, and in return, you greeted her with a trusting smile. It must have been hard to leave yesterday as she passed the torch to Grandma Maria. She can't wait to see you again. I think you miss her too. I took it upon myself to ask you her daily question: "Zoe, how grandma Roza is sleeping?" You laughed, anticipating the sound of snoring.

This picture is taken at her last night with you.